Get Good at Being Bad at Things

There are many times in life when we limit what we think we can do because of who we are. I found myself thinking the same thing today whenever I woke up. I wanted to get out and exercise somehow, but I didn’t know how. I was alone at home, and the roads around my apartment are not pedestrian or bike-safe. I’m essentially on an “island” only accessible by car, so I can’t do much casual exercise without going somewhere. 

As I lay in bed, immobilized by this task paralysis, I thought about all the things that I could technically do but felt like I shouldn’t be. I wanted to go to the rec center and move, but all the things there didn’t feel like they were for me. I could technically swim laps in the pool, but that is for people who are good at swimming. I could technically ”shoot hoops” on the basketball court, but that was for people who were good at basketball. The only things that left me were walking/running and using exercise machines…neither of those things really inspired me to get out of bed.

Then, in a sudden burst of insight, I concluded that other people’s feelings shouldn’t have the power that I was giving them. Who gets to decide who can play basketball and who isn’t? Are there a number of shots you must make to qualify as good enough to play? How would I ever get good enough to play if I never tried? That’s when I realized that the strongest people in life are the ones who allow themselves to be awful.

One of the most fulfilling discoveries you will have is realizing you are the only person who can control your decisions. Today, I chose to do what I wanted and experience things I hadn’t felt before. I bought a basketball, sharpied my name on it (RIP return policy), and went straight to the local rec center. I then played the worst 30 minutes of basketball that humanity has ever seen…but I had a blast. Throughout the time I was there, I slowly worked on my shots and kept trying. I kept an eye on my watch’s heart rate monitor and saw the calories I was burning. Even though I missed a large percentage of the shots I attempted, I was meeting my goals, which is what mattered to me. After I worked up a big sweat, I decided I needed to cool off. What better way to do that than to jump in the pool and be bad at swimming?

I have enough swimming experience to not immediately sink to the bottom of the pool whenever I hit the water, but not enough experience to swim lap after lap. As soon as I hit the water, this deficiency in swimming stamina became very apparent. I floundered and had to stop mid-lap to regain my breath many times. I would switch strokes mid-lap just to get myself to the end and catch my breath. It was not pretty…but I did it!

Looking back, I’m sure the people watching me play basketball were memeing on me. It’s not every day that someone goes out of their way to play basketball at the rec center without knowing how to play. The lifeguard at the pool was probably judging me pretty harshly as he watched me push myself just to get across the pool (while older people were casually out-swimming me). That feeling of judgment stinks, but the feeling I have now, sitting and thinking about it, is something that their judgment can’t take away. I’m not just a late 20’s college student; I’m a late 20’s college student, amateur basketball player, AND amateur swimmer. Next time I think about doing these things, I will remember that I did them once before, and they won’t be so scary. I belong in that space now. My world of opportunity and experience just got a little bit bigger. 

Next time you think about doing something new but feel immediate self-judgment because you would be bad at it, do it anyway! That’s how I started writing on this blog! I thought I didn’t deserve to speak openly and couldn’t do it…so I proved myself wrong and did. You never know what the world might look like once you open your mind to the possibilities of who you can be, not just who you have been.