The first in a multi-part series about the state of Apple in 2025. In the first part of this series, I talk about how Apple uses a parasocial relationship with enthusiasts (“fans”) to keep them coming back for more and more of the same thing year after year. I explore some really embarrassing feelings that I get whenever my devices start to get old. I ask you to read this with an open mind and save judgment until you have completed the whole post. 

Self-Image for Sale

Whenever you buy an Apple product, you are not just buying a piece of technology, you’re buying a lifestyle. We can see this phenomenon in action with young people, as many high school-aged children and young adults use iPhones so they don’t get seen as a “green bubble” (a derogatory word kids use to describe Android users). In a culture where most of our time is spent laboring, we find self-expression in the things that we buy. A nice car signals to the world that you are educated and of higher status. Eating in nice restaurants signals that you have a refined palate and are cultured enough to appreciate nuanced indulgences. Holding an iPhone means you care about your self-image. You don’t just want something that gets the job done, no, you are an iPhone user; you have taste and appreciate quality. Popping up a MacBook in a coffee shop shows you appreciate luxury and find time to make for mindful moments. 

Engaging with products in this way is an easy way to develop a premade positive self-image. In these moments of “public product peacocking” (say that 5 times fast), we feel confident. we feel like people see us the same way they see the people in the commercials.

Projecting Myself Into a Brand Image

When I see an Apple commercial, I’m not just thinking about the product being shown. When I watch the ad, I notice how it is displayed, the “kinds of people” they portray using it, and the things they highlight that it can do. In the iPad Air commercial (the device I am typing this on), I saw popular academics working in a quiet library and having a good time at school. 

I’m going to school! I want to be the kind of person who usually hangs out in the library and studies. If I buy this product, that is me! That is how the world will see me.

At the point of sale, I feel a strong connection with the brand. The Apple store is fancy and well put together because they wanted “people like me” to walk in and buy this device. The feeling is stronger the more money I spend. For the days following the purchase (during the purchasing high), I feel a sense of connection to Apple, thinking you are someone they care about. I’m important.

No Longer the Apple of Tim Cook’s Eye

Time starts to fade. The year-long period after the product comes out, I still feel like that person, but slowly, I start to feel my relevance as a technology enthusiast is fading. Then, rumors of a new product version come out, and I think, “Well, they still care about the product that I bought. They still care about me. They just must be planning for the future”.

Then, one day, I wake up and see an announcement that the replacement product is out, and mine has been discontinued. I feel deflated. The same executives who got in front of the camera and told me how important I was to them, are now saying that the new thing is so much better than the one I am holding. I feel silly for liking it. In a weird, parasocial way, it feels like if you decide to keep using the thing that you have, you are letting them down. I’m not the cool socialite in the library anymore; I’m the older adult who holds onto their electronics for too long. I’m the uncultured person who walks into class with a laptop that is 15 years old. This feeling is multiplied many times whenever they release a design that visually makes my device look dated.

What if I like the one that I am using? Why don’t I get to decide if I like what I have? No matter how many products I buy, they all feel like they are on lease, just waiting to be made valueless by the new marketing push by the company. I feel betrayed in a way that is really embarrassing to describe. There have been times when I just wished that Tim Cook would come out and say that they think it’s cool to have the one from last year, and this one is just something extra…but they don’t. Apple wants people like me, “fans”, to stay on the hamster wheel and chase the next product-purchasing high. They want me to continue defining my personality by the Apple products I own. They want me to feel disconnected from the brand and brand image until I upgrade. If I was content with my purchases for too long, how would Apple executives be able to afford their next raise? They make me feel like a victim.

When the Apple Vision Pro came out, I didn’t have enough money to buy it. I was genuinely hurt. I felt so torn up that I wouldn’t be able to be part of this moment in history. If I were a real fan, I would be lining up on day one to be part of the new “spatial computing revolution”.

Separating Self From Brand Identity

Companies are not our friends. Once the little Apple Pay sound plays and a successful purchase is made at the Apple store, they don’t care about what we do when we walk out the door. They actively want to make some part of us unhappy so we come back in those doors and buy something else ASAP.  After they were legally told to be transparent about their slowing of older devices, they quickly changed tact and are now very excited to tell you how much longevity we can get out of our devices. So, while the technical pressures to upgrade were reduced/removed, the social pressures to upgrade are still as heavy-handed and present as ever.

As I come to this realization, I know I have to make some kind of change. These feelings are not the feelings of a level-headed adult. I need to change some parts of my perspective to take back control of my personal narrative. In the future, I plan on looking at products and services in the context of my personal journey. Rather than asking “Which product can I buy to improve my self-image”, I can instead ask, “What products are available that can help me in my journey?” By reframing these pieces of aluminum and glass from social symbols to tools, I can take back control from the Apple marketing team and start making choices on my own again.

I will buy Apple products again. Outside of the hype and pressure, they genuinely do make my life easier. In the future, I want to purchase them for that benefit, not for the social status. 

This Isn’t Just About Apple…

This may not resonate with you. If not, that’s ok. I know that personal autism-fueled special interest in Apple products is niche…but I hope you can see my feelings and apply them to products and brands you care about. Are there things that you buy because they make you feel part of a community? Do you feel betrayed whenever the thing you buy becomes outdated, and you are made to feel silly for still wanting to keep it? Let me know in the comments! Thanks for reading! 

Make sure to subscribe to my email list and/or follow my RSS feed for my next post where I talk about the generational failure of the Apple Intelligence feature rollout. This article is also the first new article posted on JosephBlog.com! 🎉